Raising a three year old … aka #threenager

I wish I could freeze time. I’m sure you’ve heard that before but I love the ages of my girls. Lyla’s is 3 1/2 and Lucca is a little over two. So far 3 has been my favorite. It is so fun and I honestly love it. She can talk clearly, relate to rational things, listens and is over the “no” stage. And although she is a seasoned 3 year old and on her way to 4 ( in October )…I feel like I’ve gotten a good handle on this age and enjoying her growing personality and vocabulary so much. Sure there are melt downs, little bits of whining and lots of non-sharing with Lucca; but the fun definitely outweighs the challenging moments. I grabbed my camera since we were hanging at home after swimming. She was being her sweet & silly little self and I wanted to capture these sweet moments of fun in her room. At this moment Lyla and Lucca each have their own room. I’m not sure it will stay that way for long, but for now, they definitely enjoy their own space. If your a mom of 3 & a half year old, or a mom of a toddler, I wrote some good loving guidelines (discipline ideas) & I posted below that have worked for us. I am definitely not a pro, but my goal is to always be a learning, patient and present mommy to my sweet little girls.

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Guiding & Discipline in love.

A very hard topic, but something that children need and thrive from. Here is some basic advice from one mama to another. Remember to discipline in love, It will then take you and your little one a long long way. You will give them the confidence and guidance they need as you sit with them through the hardships and emotions of their toddler years.

1. Encourage your 3-year-old to make choices whenever possible. These choices should be limited to those you can live with. (Would you like a “Banana or Apple?” ; “Do you want to wear your red shirt or pink shirt?”) You should try not to ask a toddler an open question, for example, “Do you want to brush your teeth?”, unless you are willing to accept the answer!

2. Use the two “I’s” of discipline, “Ignore or Isolate, rather than the two “S’s”, Shouting or Spanking. When disciplining, try to separate the child and his or her behavior. Example, “I love you, but I do not like it when you touch the computer.” – This can be so tough when you (as a mommy) are tired or frustrated. Discipline should not come from induced fear, humiliation, shame, or any form of physical or emotional coercion. My best advice, is to walk away from the situation if you are overly frustrated or not sure what to do and count to 20. Even call a friend if you need to vent.

3. Provide alternatives to your little one. Example, “No, you cannot play with my cell phone, but you can color in your coloring bork or play with certain toys.”

4. Avoid power struggles and avoid being stubborn, because no one will win! 3-year-olds (sometimes) still use temper tantrums as a weapon. (again … read #2) Respond to this behavior with the two I’s of discipline – ignore or isolate. Taking a “time out” is a great way to calm down your child and actually have a conversation about the situation. Our time outs last from 30 seconds to two minutes currently due to their ages and their short attention span.

5. Discipline should be consistent and firm. Do not make threats that you can not carry out. If you say you are going to do something, do it! Your child is smart, and often times knows where to push your buttons. But remember, you as a parent need to be loving and understanding. Praising your child for good behavior and accomplishments is as equally important.

We learned in our short 3.5 years of parenting that punishment can sometimes breed negative reactions and with little ones this is often fear. We both believe and we are learning that positive techniques breed self-confidence and empathy for others. Brent and I always stand by each other and trust each other’s judgement and guideline actions. We want our girls to know that we love them so much and each other. This is something that can create a positive tone in your household and it is so important to learn how to be a team with your partner. Your children are constantly watching and growing and will copy your attitude.

Remember tomorrow is a new day! There is so much grace and I am so thankful we get and can give second chances.

xo

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  • a good guide for parents!!! once my mum told me “there’s no sens in punishing a kid after a mischief’s done, you just have to try for this not to happen”. and it’s totally true…
    i’m sure you’re doing a good job as a mum! my daughter’s 1 year older than yours and she had a lovely 2 but now at 4 she’s gone through a behavior affirmation period quite though, but all that can be overcome with tenderness.ReplyCancel

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Today is the first day in 2 weeks that I’ve felt myself. We had the case of colds, ear infections, pink eye and coughs for the last couple weeks. I’m so happy to say, I think were past the worst for a while and on the mend. We’ve been spending most of our time swimming to beat the heat and We officially have another swimmer here. Lyla did 8 private lessons and is swimming so good. If you follow me on instagram, I keep posting that she is a #mermaidatheart. Really, the girl loves to be in the water. Lucca, on the other hand, likes the water but for only a short time. Thankfully, she likes her puddle jumper life jacket. That may have been the best investment I’ve ever made.
We are staying busy with weddings and about half way done for 2015. Traveling every weekend has gotten the best of me and I’m ready for a vacation.
We also have some exciting news on the horizon. Looking forward to sharing that soon. But until then… I’ll do my best to keep blogging! Hope you all have a great week!

xo

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Happy Monday friends! ( Or Tuesday if you are on the opposite side of the world ;)) Brent and I have been crazy over here lately, but we are alive and excited to have some down time after a 3 wedding weekend! This is definitely our busy season, and although I don’t have a ton of time to blog in between working and spending time with my family, today I spent the day outside with my little ones and doing a mini shoot for jbhandmades.  Rebecca, the mama behind one of our favorite handmade shops, ( just had a baby !!)  and has added some new inventory to her etsy shop.  In honor of the 4th, which is this Saturday, I did a little holiday inspiration for you. Here are a few of my favorite images from the shoot of Lyla and Lucca.  We love love all of our bows from JBhandmades. But, this one takes the cake, which you can see here.  We have been wearing her bows for a long time and it is so fun to have our collection grow. And don’t worry, If you have little boys in your life, she also makes the cutest bow ties!! Feel free to follow along on her instagram…You don’t want to miss out on any sales and one of a kind items!!  DSCF6993Pin It DSCF7001Pin It DSCF7089-2Pin It
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I took these a few weeks ago on a walk with Lucca.  Just me and her while Brent was hangin with Lyla. I can’t believe she is two and I feel like she is growing so fast.  I am definitely craving another little baby. It is funny how that happens. Two of my girl friends just had babies and another friend is expecting. Now that I am getting ready for number three…I am starting to notice all the pregnant bellies out there.  It is time I’m once again that leaning on the Lord and trusting in HIS perfect timing has to stay in the forefront of my thoughts.  I realize that I am so incredibly blessed by my two girls. I love being a mom. I love being their mom. I sometimes think I love them too much, my heart can’t take it… can you love too much?   It is funny how motherhood works. The process of becoming a mom, and all that goes with it.  Brent and I are thinking and talking a lot about our future, their future… schools, life, adventure, experiences.  We want them to have it all and more.  Brent and I had two very different upbringings… thankfully we both grew up knowing Jesus. Our parents taught us to trust in the Lord and that HE comes first. So now, we are seeking HIS guidance for our future.  Our decisions matter, and we know they will affect our girls lives and our own families.   Thankfully we know HE will direct our paths.   My word and mantra for 2015 is Brave.  I am still working on this.  What this means in my life and how it will shine through.   To be brave in giving, to be brave in communicating, vulnerable in friendships, taking risks, loving hard and living in the fullest.   Life is great. I pray that today we all know our true identities, who God made us to be.  Our time is definitely pulled in a 1000 directions,  especially as a wife and mom.  Thankfully there is grace and today is a new day.  I am truly blessed. xo

 

 

 

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I love Summer. It is definitely my favorite season and it has been 90 degrees and glorious. Despite our drought, we have a pool and it is the best way to keep us cool and entertained.  I can’t believe its June 1st and well… we are 6 months into 2015. I’m still here,  missing not blogging as often as before, but yet enjoying the time with the girls, traveling with Brent and not adding extra to-do’s on my plate. It is definitely bitter sweet, but I am being brave by saying, turning off social media and the computer is actually refreshing. There are moments of feeling like I could be missing out but, I know that I’m gaining more time with my girls. Which in this season with my little babes being so young, I want to soak them all up.  We are in full force wedding season, which means 4-5 weddings per month.  It is a blessing to know that our business is thriving, and we have a full year ahead of us. We enjoy our Monday- Friday at home and really love the freedom our jobs give us.

I recently bought these popsicle molds and it may have been the best idea I ever had.  As you know, I love smoothies and make green smoothies almost daily for my girls. Now with the leftovers they have popsicles (aka ice cream )!!! Seriously, I can’t believe I just found these.
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I took these pictures last week as we were playing outside.  I haven’t taken “portraits” of my girls in a while.. so here are a few of Lyla at three and a half. She actually does not love the camera, but atleast she understands that I’m trying to capture memories of her and Lucca. Lyla, you are such a blessing and full of joy. You are so fun to be with and you love life.  I often look at you and am in awe that you are ours.  You are one of a kind and such a gift.  Maybe one day it will soak in.

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